Grandpa-isms

As some of you know, me and the Man live with my Grandpa in my aunt and uncle's house while aunt and uncle are on an LDS mission in Wales. We'll be moving into our own place closer to the dental school in June, when aunt and uncle come home, so this arrangement will soon draw to a close. 


Grandpa is the spryest 92-year-old I've ever met. He still drives. And when riding in the car with him, I only fear for my life or the life of another person maybe twice.


This grandfather of mine is very loving and a devoted servant of Heavenly Father.
Here are some of his pearls of wisdom:

"Treat people better than you want to be treated."

"Leave a place better than it was when you came." This is true for lots of things. Whether it's the home of a friend, the house of the Lord, or the gas station.

"All that matters in this life is to help other people."

And he's fiesty.
Examples:


-talking about- 
skim milk: "That's colored water. We used to feed that stuff to the hogs."
his favorite sports team: "Don't have to watch the crappy Suns tonight."
being the best home teacher: "Never made me no money."
his wedding to Grandma: (After I jokingly asked if her dad had a shot gun) "Shot gun? No. He had a rifle."


And the best one, which happened last night:


The Man... er.... passed gas. I heard it. He thought Grandpa heard it. To gloss it over, hubby blamed it on "barking spiders."
I laughed. 
Grandpa asked what barking spiders were.


 ...


I thought all men knew.
The Man had to explain it.